Episode 12: Who you gonna call? 911! (the deathbed confession episode)

This week's topic: Crazy deathbed confessions

Cori and Laura discuss some disturbing family secrets, and crimes that have been revealed just before the responsible person party kicks the bucket. Listen in and find out which one of the ladies learned she has additional family members as a result of a deathbed confession.  You'll also learn about why some secrets should be taken to the grave. (Does anyone really want to know you've been cooking with urine?) Have any secrets you're planning to keep until the last possible second? Reach out and let us know! See you on the other side :)

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Transcript

00:03
Welcome back, crazy friends, to my crazy friend podcast. I'm Cori. I'm Laura. This is the podcast where we talk about crazy shit. Yes, and everything in between. Everything in between. This week, we are going to be talking about crazy deathbed confessions. Yes, we are, but before we get into that, do you have any crazy shit from this week that happened to you? Oh, that's right, our new segment. Our new segment, crazy shit from the week. Week! Woo!

00:33
So I was gonna say on the way home from our last recording session, I was listening to the radio. Yes, I do not have satellite in my car because I'm, you know, poor, cheap. I don't know what you want to say. So I listen to the radio, which nobody does anymore. Nobody does. I don't have satellite. I just listen to my Spotify. But go ahead. My husband has satellite. That's fine. Go ahead. And you know, it's not fair. No, it's not fair. You know, I should have it too, but no, no. So I listen to the radio. So I'm listening to the radio.

01:03
giving advice on I mean every time I leave for some reason I leave your house and it's always this time where the DJ is giving advice. So this one was on snoring and I thought of you. Oh did you? Because you're a snorer. It says you. Yes did you know according to the guy on the radio that one of the ways to help your snoring is singing. In my sleep? Just singing all the time. So apparently

01:33
muscles in your throat and mouth and stuff that are like a little, you know, lazy. So singing helps all that. So I just thought that's a gift that could keep giving to everyone. I know your husband and your son are going to be so happy that I told you this, but I think now you need to sing all day every day. I think I will. And you need to be like, I'm working on my snoring, Shawn, for you, right? You don't get to have it both ways. Nope. And I know you're singing.

02:02
voice so I am I'm delighted to share that you know more with the world.

02:11
So anyway, not really crazy, but I thought of you. I thought of you on the way home. I thought, you know what? You need to know that piece of advice. That counts. Yes, thank you. I'm thinking of all the ways I can use that to my advantage. Right? You know, now when I start singing, obviously like, you know, they tell me that's enough, shut up, nobody wants to hear you, blah, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, you try to sing in the car and they're just mean. Right? Mean. Right, so. I'm thinking you need to be like, listen, this is for medical purposes. Like this is for your benefit, not mine. Right, eventually. I don't care if I snore.

02:41
you up with my snoring. Yeah, this is for you. So there, you're welcome. Thank you. It's a gift for you. Thank you. My little piece of knowledge. On our educational podcast. If nothing else. Yeah, I really did not too much crazy but I did like I said I thought of that. My week in general was just a crazy week that I'm just glad that it's over and I'm here with you. That about sums up mine too.

03:11
happened for you? So my crazy stuff. So I had two things. One, my crazy shit from the week is how we have this party every year. I call it a party, but it's really an open house, and friends and family come. It's a music festival. A music festival. Yes. I still think we're going to call it the bowl. I came up with some names. They've all been vetoed. I know. The one I like the most was vetoed. Lollabalooza. None of the probably trademark issues.

03:41
of them but yeah I'm bringing my tent one of these years and I'm just gonna stay it's gonna become a whole thing yeah you have enough you have enough acreage oh totally I wanted to get some of those hanging tent things you know like that you can fancy and I ordered one but it turned out to be a scam and yeah to get a refund it was a whole thing are you serious

04:02
Aww. That makes me sad. I ordered, do you know those stair slides? Have you seen those on the internet? Yeah. Where you put them on and you, I ordered a stair slide. Scam. I'm sorry. I didn't get it. I had to get my money back. That was quite an ordeal to get my money back. I'm sorry for you. I'm sorry you had to go through that. You too. Thank you. We're gonna have to get you some tents. All I can envision, all I can envision is like opium dens in your backyard with like these beautiful tents

04:32
on like big pipe things. I know that's not what's gonna happen, but in my head that's what I think of. It's like the next woodstock. Yeah, that's what I'm thinking. Okay, I like it. Great. So. It's gonna happen. We planned a date for this year. Woo! Woohoo! And we have some musical artists already lined up. Shut your mouth. I'm very excited. Artists or artists? Really, more than one. More than one. So Jonah Matrenga is coming. I knew that one. I didn't know there was anybody else. So Nathan Gray is coming. Aw. I'm not sure if he's bringing,

05:02
Iron Roses is their new band, so I don't know if the whole band's coming or just them, but either way, that's gonna be good. Yeah, either way. I think the band just needs to come even if they're not playing. That's what I said, come party with us. And then Jeff Cottle from Game Face is checking his schedule so he might be coming, so I'm trying to make it a whole big music fest all day. I'm telling you. That's my goal. Eventually, before I die, we'll have music all day, maybe all weekend at our house. I felt like that was, it was close to that last year. Getting there.

05:32
That's my dream. So that's my crazy shit. We're one step closer to my, that's not my deathbed confession, but my bucket list. That's really the only thing that's on there. I love it. I love it. I love it. So speaking of deathbed confessions this week, you know, sometimes we try whatever theme we're doing to relay it to personal experiences. And so this is not quite a deathbed. Before we go into that though, I had another update.

06:02
Shit. You just say two. Sorry. That's okay. You know, I always count things and then I add another one on the end. I'm so distracted by your finger. Thank you. That it's not white. It was red. It was a big red clown finger and now it's white. And I just, you're talking with your hands. I tend to do that. I'm distracted. It's like, it's almost like it's putting a spell on me. Thank you. Big finger. See, it's my big conducting baton. Yeah, for those of you that didn't know, this is Laura cut off the tip of her finger. You need to listen to that story

06:32
I laugh about that every day as much as I don't want you in pain or hurting because I love you The story is so funny. Mm-hmm. So funny What's great is literally everybody I tell about it I don't know if I said this last time or not But I told people at work because they could see on zoom they're like what happened to your finger Yeah, they're like, well who the hell let you use a mandolin everyone everybody Buddy we have I didn't ask permission. We did yoga this morning Laura She hosts yoga in her house and a yoga teacher comes and it's

07:02
delightful and we had it this morning and none of them had seen her finger yet because you guys were at a soccer tournament last Saturday so I had to tell the story they were rolling they were rolling at the fact that yes and and no one's surprised by it. No. It kills me everyone's like oh yeah. Oh that happens. I was like yeah I should lead with that when I talk about how clumsy you are I should lead with look at her finger. Anyways. Number two. Give me your second

07:32
I was trying to like smooth transition. I know I just failed. That was a hard fail hard Maybe we can edit that out and swap it back over. I'm not gonna bother doing that Nobody is cuz that somebody would be me and I'm not so no just pretend that that was a smooth transition I know just hard cut back in there. I know you tried really hard to like teach me how to do those things I think they would help you know, but I'm yeah, you just keep me company I just fail at everything not everything no no just that transition right then and there

08:02
But that's fine. So my other update fails. I feel a lot. Okay, two things anyways So last week when my crazy word was a French goodbye. Yes, and then when we were editing it I was like French Goodbye, I think I meant Irish goodbye. Yeah, so Like I was thinking I'm like you said French you said French which I think it is French But I remember it is I read it is Irish goodbye, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, so I guess it could be both Yes

08:32
French goodbye but I was really it doesn't matter why it is Irish goodbye French goodbye is similar oh yeah well and honestly when it comes to your husband Sean yeah yeah Irish goodbye would make more sense yeah it would yeah oh I guess it was him yeah I listened to it and he goes uh was a French goodbye I do the Irish goodbye yeah yeah well I was trying to find my goodbye and you know it didn't happen but you know but at the end of the day I was proud of us

09:02
because I think you had said French goodbye, Irish goodbye, potato potato. Yeah. And I was like, oh look. Yeah. It was used correctly. Yeah, just damn it, why can't we ever be recording when I say something like that? So I'm just gonna say that out loud. Thank you. So it was a good example of potato potato because I think we failed at the examples of potato potato. Yeah, trying to come up with one on the spot is hard. It is. You should write it down next time. I should. Anyway. If only I had a notebook and pen in front of me. Yeah, yeah, only if only. Yes. Anyway.

09:32
be you know what I do with it. I write down other things so like shows I should watch, music recommendations. I have a list of to-do's. Oh. If I don't have a to-do list it doesn't get done. Well

09:43
There you go. On that note, I think you should dive right back into this week's death bed confessions. What? Death bed confessions? You say it. Wow. You, your mouth, what did, yeah, I got a spasm there. I don't know what to say again, it's weird. You go. I'm gonna go. I think I stroked out for a second. You take it. I'm back. I'm good. You take a break, okay? You just sit back and you just don't even worry you're pretty little hit. Okay, now we didn't compare notes. I hope you didn't do mine. Oh well, you know what? I did a list, so if I did,

10:13
If I start to talk about it, I can just cut it out. Okay. You know, cause I got more than one. I'll just ex you. Cause you know how I am, I can't admit to one story. No, I know. This is who I am. And I can't do research on more than one. That's just who I am. So, you've got your list, I've got my one. You get what you get. And you don't throw a fit. Nope. Anyway, so I wanted to relay it to a personal, and I don't have obviously any deathbed confessions, but. Cause you're still alive. Well, I meant like, I don't know, I wasn't around someone dying and they didn't confess anything to me.

10:43
I was just kidding. Go ahead. Yeah, whatever. So, I realized this is kind of a deathbed confession. So my mother, right before her aunt died, got a letter in the mail and it said, hey, by the way, your sister is Patty, your cousin. What? Yes!

11:08
So when my sister is Patty, your cousin. So my mother long, so just to put this short, my grandmother was married before, which is my mom's mom, and she had a daughter that she named Patty, and her husband was killed in a car accident, and they thought that the daughter, there was all these stories of what happened to the daughter, if the daughter had passed away, or the daughter was put up for adoption because my grandma had like a nervous kind of breakdown,

11:38
If the daughter was special needs and then died young like there was all these different things No one really knew what happened to Patty Wow So then later my grandmother marries my grandfather and they have my mom and her brother my uncle George and And this whole time her My grandma's sister has a daughter named Patty

12:00
And my mom always thought, well, isn't that kind of mean to name your daughter Patty when she knew about her mom's daughter Patty, who had passed away, is the ending of everyone thought she died. Right. With the, and her ex. And come to find out, my mom got a letter. And this is after my grandma died, my grandfather passed away. This was like, and that her sister is actually her cousin Patty. My grandma apparently just was in such distraught from losing her husband.

12:30
that her sister took Patty and raised Patty as her own and that's just the way it happened. So her sister never told anybody either? No, and to this day, so this woman came to my wedding shower and I was introduced to this Patty lady who was my aunt that I didn't even know I had. And my mom's like, well, I don't really wanna tell her. I don't think it's my place to tell her. My mom's always wanted a sister. So I'm like, mom, tell her. But she's just like, you know what? You know, so she's, my mom's 72 years old and she's like, I just don't think it's my place.

13:00
But yeah, my mom has a sister. Holy shit. So I mean, kind of a death bank. I mean, it counts because she's not here anymore. I mean, it wasn't on her deathbed, but it was a confession that, I just think there's a lot of that. I'm telling you, if we really got the 23 and me, and I really just started making all of my family do that, there are just so many things. I think I definitely, my dad was married before. He got it annulled, and if you know my father, we don't know how we feel about that, actually annulment.

13:30
actually happening unless her family did it. He's in the military and he got married overseas. So I could have siblings. I could, I.

13:37
Who knows? Who knows? It's crazy. We're going to do an episode on that. Are we? Yeah. Crazy boss families. Anyway, so yeah. So this week, I was intrigued by this. This whole deathbed confession. Concept. This is a whole concept. Yeah, me too. And you know, I read so many and like really fucked up. Oh, I know. Me too. And I think, holy shit, like people didn't go to jail. That should have.

14:07
People went to jail that shouldn't have. Yeah, and people knew about it. How do you sleep at night? I don't know. I don't know either. So I narrowed it down to a few. I think I got like four. I'm going to share with you now. OK. All right, ready? Yes. Numero uno. Numero uno. That's Spanish for number one. This one. This one blew me away. OK. OK. So this guy's mom had a patient. She's a hospice nurse. OK. And the patient was obviously terminally ill.

14:37
to killing his twin brother in Vietnam. So he could blame the death on the war, steal his identity, and return to be with his wife. What? Yes. And he played that out through his whole life? And pretended to be his brother. Oh my God. You know what made me laugh? Stuart, I'm telling my husband these, I'm like, do you have anything to add to this week's Deathbed Confessionals? And he goes, I read him that.

15:07
And he goes, missed opportunity? And I said, what? Why? He goes, ah.

15:15
How do you not buy a million dollar life insurance policy on yourself? And then, not only do you get the wife, but you get a million dollars. I said, oh my God, Stuart, I can't believe. I mean, right? Missed opportunity, it's twisted and demented. But you know what, that's how, you know, not that he would act on it, but the fact that, you know, you could have had it even better, but how could you do that? How could you not be who you are? I just, I just. Well, I'm assuming that the first brother

15:45
with a wife and whatever. And the other one was a loser. I mean, instead of working hard, I'm just gonna steal his life. It's way easier. And the patient's daughter and everything, they all just chalked it up to, oh, it's Alzheimer's. They didn't wanna believe it. Oh my God. Yeah, but the hospice nurse was like, he was pretty adamant. He was pretty lucid. Yeah, he knew. Holy shit. This whole time, that's not your dad. Because apparently, the kids belonged to the dead. Oh my, oh, yes!

16:15
Yes! Oh my god, that's so fucked up. Married with babies, off to Vietnam, came back to... Different guy. Different guy. Holy shit. Mm-hmm. That's nuts. Right? All right. All right. Numero two. It's not how it goes. Go ahead. Numero dos. There you go. Thanks. Okay, I took seven years of Spanish. Nailed it. Can't speak it. Can't read, you know, whatever, it's fine. It was a long time ago. Yeah.

16:43
All right, so this guy's dad was a pastor. And he...

16:52
Apparently had this tattoo on him and he never talked about it. Okay pastor with a tattoo No, it was a really conservative church. Okay. No one really had tattoos. Okay. Okay, like a no-go Yeah, and it was on his arm and on his deathbed He explained to his son that when he was 19 years old He was a bank robber and a safecracker and it was he got arrested and that was a prison tattoo And he his family never knew it Yeah How cool was that?

17:22
I didn't even know it. No. You thought your dad was a slain priest. Turns out he was a cool bank robber dude. Right? Bar. Didn't even like to hang out with the other guy. Missed opportunity. Right? Yeah. First dad sounds way cooler than second dad. Thank you. How could it possibly be the same person? Oh my god. So yeah, all right, so that's number two. There you go. Good job. You don't like me to mix my languages. I don't care if you wanna use Spanglish, knock yourself out. Is that what it's called? Yeah, you do that. I'll do me. Okay. That's what I do every day.

17:52
To the detriment of everyone else.

17:56
Trace. There you go. Good job. Numero trace. It's fine. Dry. That's German. I was doing German with my kid the other day because he's taking German. All right. So this one, the mom grew up thinking her sister Suzanne died by slipping and falling in the bathtub when they were in their 20s. And it was later on the grandfather on his deathbed admitted that they actually found that she committed suicide.

18:26
Yeah. What? Yeah, they all thought that her sister slipped. No. How did they find out? Well, they knew. The parents knew. The parents, oh. They just didn't tell the kids. The kids, they'd always said that their sister slipped and fell and she actually killed herself. I just thought that was an interesting one. Yeah. All right. And let's see here. Let's see here. Oh. Yeah, I'm good. Okay. You're always quick to pause it because I'm such a hesitator.

18:56
Are you hesitating because you don't know where you're at or you're just hesitating? Oh no, I'm prepared today. Okay, got it. Go ahead. I'm prepared. So, okay, so this person's grandfather had pretty bad dementia and he kept on making all these crazy deathbed confessions, like killing people, witnessing murders, seeing like car accidents, train accidents, plane accidents. And they were like, who the hell is this guy? They were like amazed and like every day it was a different story. He was in hospice.

19:26
come to find out. He was watching the news. And in his dementia, when they came over that evening, after the news, he would just tell it like it was his. Oh my God.

19:38
This whole time they thought like he had witnessed a murder and he had killed somebody and raped somebody. It was like horrible stories. That's a life criminal of some kind. Like where is he from? Like I'm this guy. Did he have like two different lives that we didn't know about? Nope, it was just the news. Oh my god. That one made me laugh.

20:00
Can you imagine? No. What else happened, Grandpa? Right? Well, today I was in Congress and passed a few bills. So he only focused on the negatives, though? I guess. There was no, yeah, it was all like. He didn't tell anybody about all the puppies he saved. Right? Whatever. Missed opportunity. Yeah, I just think maybe that's proof that the news is a little too negative. I think it's a little more positive for the people on their deathbeds. That's right. They can't be bothered with this nonsense. Oh, so I love it.

20:30
I said four. Yeah, I saw one. Two more. Holy shit! You pulled a Laura. I did!

20:36
So okay this one grossed me out you ready? Yeah, this person's great aunt on her deathbed confessed to frequently Mixing urine in their scrambled eggs. Oh my god. Yes so I guess according to This there is some kind of virgin boy egg thing That's from China centuries ago where you put the the pea the urine of a virgin in your food

21:06
I don't know good luck. I'm not even sure where it comes from. The whole concept fascinates me. I'm sure it does. But she said that it was served to her and it was like they had a stable boy and instead of using water, she would use urine in their eggs. From the stable boy? Yes. The stable boy's urine. Yes. Did she feed the stable boy specific foods and drinks? She insisted that the stable boy was handsomely compensated for his services. I wasn't as concerned about that.

21:35
Like is it like organic? You know, like you feed your chickens certain things to get like, if you're gonna get somebody's urine in your food. This is just someone that works in their stable. I don't think that she, you know, was making sure he was eating organically. No, no, no, I mean like not that he's eating organically, but like what if he had like, you know, beer and stuff and like broccoli the night before or coffee. What is it? What makes your pee smell? Asparagus. Asparagus. Maybe he had asparagus. Like these are stinky eggs today, auntie. I don't know. I mean, don't you want to like make sure that your source of urine isn't tainted

22:05
Well, and I just feel like at some point, like there's some things I think deathbed confessions are good for. That one you could just kept to yourself. Right? Take that one with you to the grave. No need. No one needs to know they're eating. All right. All right. Last one. Okay. Okay. So this one, do you remember the estate sale we went to? Where we found the, the, uh, the fucking pigs. The fucking pigs? Yeah. Or the, or what did you call them? You know, it was very specific. It was vintage. Vintage cast iron mating pigs. Yes. The vintage. I didn't call them.

22:35
that that's what Etsy called them. The vintage cast iron mating pigs were discovered at this location. Okay I read this one and I thought this could have been from that actual house. Are you ready? I'm ready. Let's do it. So over the course of this person's great-grandmother's life nearly a hundred years, she literally had thousands of owl figurines. She had wall clocks

23:05
lamps, stained glass, salt shakers, all owls just like this house we were in. Yeah. So she um on her deathbed she confessed that she never really understood the owls. It wasn't like she liked them.

23:23
She didn't, she just started with one. It just kept going. Turns out, she didn't give a shit about owls at all. Someone had gotten her, it was in the 40s or 50s, bought her like an owl trivet and salt and pepper shakers and then someone got her something else. And then again and again and again and from then on, everyone kept on buying her owl shit. And she didn't even like owls. She's trying to poke out the tongue.

23:53
Well, here she is. But she didn't tell anybody about it until she was dying. Because she didn't want to be rude. Right. I think it was the ladies' house we were in. You remember all the owls? Well, I bought one of the, I bought an owl teapot. Yeah. I love it. Yeah. It's adorable. Yeah, and you even, didn't you get like little owl figurines or did I buy the little owl figurine? Maybe I have. You might have bought them. I was going to say, there was owls everywhere. There was owls in the kitchen, and owls in, anyway. That's so funny. I just thought it was crazy because I was like, could you imagine your whole life, people thinking you like something and you didn't?

24:23
That's funny. Well, that's kind of, so I can relate to her because somebody that I used to work with, he had a daughter who had outgrown butterflies in the room. So he had all these butterfly things. So he didn't want to get rid of them. It was like a lamp and one of them displayed butterflies on the ceiling and tons of stuff. Anyway, so one night I went home and I came back in the morning and he had put all of this stuff in my office and he had put printed out stuff with my name and butterflies on it. And I'm like, where did all this butterfly stuff come from? He's like, oh, well you like butterflies.

24:53
I was like, oh I do? He was, yeah, you do. Then he starts explaining to me all the reasons why I like butterflies. So then it became, well, Laura likes butterflies, so I've got butterfly shit now. That's crazy. I know. My sister actually likes butterflies. I have embraced it. I like them now, but I didn't realize that I did until I was told and- Well you know, sometimes you need to be told, I guess. Well so maybe she should have embraced the owls. That's all I'm saying. She did. Okay, good. She did. She just wanted everyone to know that, you know, even after 50 years,

25:22
She still didn't understand it. Still didn't really like them. They were fine, they were fine, but she didn't understand it. It's so funny. That's awesome. Oh my gosh. Yeah, I had a, I liked fairies for a while, and they were in my bathroom when I was in college, and I had little fairies that sat, and like the toothbrush thing was fairies, and there was just like little fairies everywhere. I was only into fairies, and then I became an adult, and I was like. That's where you went wrong. Right, and then I, you know, I'm back to my house is my house, but for a while I thought, oh, I can't have fairies in my bathroom.

25:52
I need to be an adult. But I have no problem telling people. Like I tell my mother no more fairies. I was like, cause I had a fairy lamp and a fairy, I still have a couple like remnants of fairies in my house, but. Well it sounds like she may have passed that threshold where I guess after you've passed 200, how are you gonna tell somebody no more owls? She's gonna be like. She just sounds like she's a nicer person than I am. Well. You think. That's all. Okay. That's all it is. Wow. You know. Learn to set some boundaries lady. Now you're dead, it's fine. It's fine. But we're still living.

26:22
Boundary issues. And if we have your owls, thank you. Thank you. We love them. Yeah

26:27
Amazing. And that's all I got. Deathbed confessions. All right, my turn? You are up, my friends. Okay, so I'm fascinated with true crime. So, you know, I was gonna do a true crime deathbed confession, like what was solved by... Don't you listen to a podcast about deathbed confessions? Yeah, so here's the thing. So I wanted to do one that wasn't done by that podcast, right, so I haven't listened to them all. But so I just started Googling like deathbed confessions, true crime, and so I found one.

26:57
And I'm like, I'm gonna do research. So I start researching it and writing the story. Son of a bitch, if that fucking podcast didn't already do it. Of course they did. Right, but it wasn't by the person who died's name, it was by the deathbed confession person's name. So that's why I didn't. Realize. Anyway. But that's okay. So I just listened to that. There's gonna be overlap in everything that we do. It's okay. Totally, I just wanted to, you know, use my investigative journalism training, not investigative, but journalism training a little bit. Well, I think that I need you to help.

27:27
with some of that stuff. You're really good at it. But anyway, that's fine. That's fine. That's fine. It's fine. It doesn't even matter. It's neither here nor there. But yeah, they did cover it. So. Well, you know, I don't listen to that podcast. So this will be all new to you. So this will all be new to me. Perfect. Okay. So I'm going to tell it in a little bit of a different order anyway. It'll be a surprise. It's all a surprise to me, babe. Yeah. So.

27:48
This woman in, okay, back up. This takes place in Tennessee in July 5th, on July 5th, 1995. Something I had just learned about Tennessee recently was that they have some laws where you can go to jail for like up to six months for being homeless in a park. I think you covered that on our Crazy Laws podcast. Yeah, well, just real quick side note. My son found out that loitering in Tennessee is only like 30 days in a misdemeanor,

28:18
felony and six months in jail for being in the park. So they all decided to go to like the mayor's and all their backyards and stay there because it's only 30 days in jail on a misdemeanor and so it all backfired. Nice. That's awesome. Isn't that great? I just thought it was just like it made me laugh. Well this isn't that. Of course it's not. I just wanted you to know you didn't ruin my story. Oh I didn't think it was gonna be. This is about laws. Anyway just literally someone had just told me about

28:48
I just want to share it with you. Is that okay? Thank you, that's perfectly fine. Okay. In fact, it's better than fine. Wonderful. Okay, good. I will shut up now. No, no, no, don't. The floor is yours. Ask questions, because I might know the answers. Don't ask too many. Okay, so July 5th, 1995, are you there? Yes, I just graduated from high school. Oh wow, I'm still in high school. Yeah, because you're a bitch. Yeah, aw, I'm just a baby. Anyway, so this woman is driving down the street, and she, there's an abandoned church that has kind of turned into a drug den.

29:18
and she passes it. Cool, cool. Cool, cool. And outside of it she sees a black Camaro and a silhouette in the window. And she just kind of is like, whatever, it's probably just some kind of drug deal or something going down, okay? And then later, same day, couple hours later in the morning, that same abandoned church is now on fire. Oh! Okay, so witnesses see it and they're like, oh my God, this place is on fire, what if there's people in there? Because maybe there's some people camping out or whatever. So they like run in. So they squat in, whatever. Yeah, so they run in.

29:48
and try and find out what's going on and there's a rolled up carpet that's on fire so they find an old mattress and they put the carpet out and they're like why is this carpet burning and then they see inside like sticking out feet and leg and head. Oh my god. Yeah so they're like oh my god. Someone's killing a woman and want to just burn it down to get rid of the evidence. Yes pretty much so they call 911 okay. Good. Good thoughts. That's what I thought.

30:17
gonna call? 9-1-1. That's right bitches. But don't call them unless you really have a good reason because they don't like it. No they get really pissy about it I've heard. My kids have called so I know. Help with homework. No. So anyway so the cops came and they investigate and like said it was a woman who had been murdered they found blood on her head and a cinder block nearby so they think you're like

30:47
I do watch a lot of Law and Order. I sure do. Listen to a lot of True Crime. I sure do. So they're trying to identify the woman. So they're looking at her and they realize that the body is deformed. It's burnt. The skull is crushed. Her nose and cheek is crushed.

31:08
She has a stab to the neck. There is no smoke in her lungs, so they realized she was dead before the fire. Yeah, I could've told you that. Yeah, she does have cocaine in her blood though. So they're like, shit, are we gonna be able to like, anyway, so they run their fingerprints through because they weren't sure if they were gonna be able to get a hit because it was burned, but they did. So they found out that the murder victim was Joyce Goodiner, who was a 35 year old woman who had three daughters, age 13, 15, and 19. Oh, that's terrible.

31:38
He knew. So they start investigating and they go and talk to the boyfriend, because you know, boyfriend usually does it. And the boyfriend's like, nope, wasn't me. I've been here or wherever all night. So his story checks out, I guess. So he's like, but you know, I know she was meeting up with this other guy, this guy named Washington. Okay. George Washington. His first name is Washington? James Washington. Okay, well I can think of his George Washington,

32:08
He's like, shit, shit, shit, why can I not think of this? James Washington. It's close. It was close, I know that's the problem. So, James Washington. So they're like, okay, well let's investigate this James Washington character. Sure. You know? And then in the meantime, this witness comes forward saying, hey, I saw this car outside before the house burnt down and somebody inside, it was a black Camaro. Just FYI, I don't know if it's related, blah, blah, blah. But you should probably talk to whoever owns the black Camaro, absolutely. Didn't get a license plate though, but just keep it in mind.

32:38
So then the cops go and visit James Washington. Yes, and he was like, yeah, I saw her. Yeah, I was with her Yeah, I had borrowed my brother's car. He's got it back now. We hooked up We was it a black Camaro it was and he's like we traded sex for drugs So like I gave her some cocaine we had sex in my car. She went back in she was fine when I left her But yeah, I did see her like we did hook up but that's whatever so like well that explains the cocaine in her system There was no sperm on her

33:07
on fire. So who knows, right? I mean you don't know where he came so that's well that's true too. So they're so they've got well this all like where are the kids at this point? Well I think that she was homeless and they were just kind of doing their like they were older 13, 15, 19. So you know 13 they got to be living with someone. I mean in the system they were the relative. I don't know. You could let me know that. Yeah I'll make sure I research that part of the story for you. Okay thanks.

33:37
What about the kids? You know me. I know you do. So anyway, so then this guy, James Washington, was like, no, and then after I left her, I actually went and smoked crack with somebody else. Nice. Yeah, so like, we're cool. Busy day. Right? Don't look at me. Yeah, I was with her, also with somebody else. But you need to talk to my crack friend. Right. He'll justify, or not justify, he'll- He'll back me up. He'll corroborate my- Yes, thank you. Yeah, so the cops are like, well, shit. Basically, they're thinking,

34:07
two guys, but both of them kind of check out. So it goes unsolved for years. And then 13 years later, James Washington is in jail on another second degree murder charge. And he's having a heart attack. He's like freaking out. Go figure. Right? He's having seizures, he says, and heart attacks. So he's like, I'm dying. I need my deathbed confession. So he calls another corrections officer over because he's dying.

34:37
closest calls this guy over tells him I killed somebody they're like no shit you're in jail for second-degree murder and he's like no no no somebody else like I beat her to death and told him the name and they were like okay so they research it story checks out and then guess what dude didn't die

34:57
Shut up. The dude didn't die. Good! No! Fucking asshole. Guess where dude is now. Still in jail. He's in jail because he got prosecuted for that murder too. Wow. And he tried to claim some crazy defense of the medicine caused him to hallucinate so when he confessed to the murder he wasn't kind of like your dementia patient. Yeah. Kind of like no, no, no. I just was projecting what I saw. Like yes, I saw her that night and I also killed this other guy.

35:27
So I was putting those two stories in my head, together in my head, and I didn't really kill her. He should have said the crack guy did it, because he said he was with the crack guy.

35:35
Yeah, I don't think I don't know if the crack guy knew her. I don't know not even that but like come on police Really you're gonna like say oh, yeah, you're alibis an addicted crack dealer that this guy well I can think they always figured they just there was no evidence. There's no proof They couldn't prove it was him, but like I guess they stopped investigate. I don't know because they knew it was Homeless and stuff like that then you know and no one's pushing You know you know if you if no one's pushing for answers or you know they have a lot to do so

36:05
It's kind of bullshit. Yeah. That's crazy, though. Right? Wow. Good, good. I'm glad. I love when justice is served. I know. One of my biggest things that bothers me is innocent people in jail. It drives me. It's one of those things where if I start to think about it and go down that rabbit hole, then I'm like, I've got to get back out of it. Because it's just depressing. You don't want to be, you know? So the fact that he's guilty and he gets to stay in jail, good.

36:35
Good, don't kill people. It's not that hard. No. Look at me, not killing people right now. I do it every day. I know. You know? I think I should get some credit for that because there are some people that I would like to kill. I told my mom, because she was saying that, I forget, she said something about me and I said I feel like I'm basically like Mother Teresa. Right? And she goes, I don't think you're quite on her level. I feel like I have saved as many lives as she has. More. Probably more. And she goes, I don't think that you have.

37:05
I explained to her all the people that I have wanted to kill and then I haven't. So I have saved their lives from the monster in me. So they're welcome. Where's my fucking medal? Ha ha!

37:17
My husband has amazing self-control, right? Right. He just lost a bunch of weight. Like he wants to do something, he can do it. And he always makes fun of me and says that I don't. And I was like, buddy, you have no idea. The self-control that I wield every day, not to take my car and just ram it into somebody. On that note, that's all I got. That's all I got. So later? Later!

37:45
Hey, before we go, wasn't there something you want to tell all the peoples? Hahaha

37:51
Yeah, don't forget to rate, review, and subscribe to our little podcast wherever you like to listen. We heard it's important. Super important. Yep, and where else can they find us, Laura? You know what, I'm glad you asked. They can also find us on Facebook, TikTok, and Instagram at My Crazy Friend Podcast. And if you have anything you wanna tell us, just email us at mycrazyfriendpodcast.gmail.com. All that is accurate. So yeah, until next time. Later.

38:21
you