Episode 2: Bathroom chicken fingers (the gift list episode)

This week's topic: Crazy gifts

This is the episode that keeps on giving. Cori and Laura discuss some of the craziest gifts that people have ever given... and some that they've received. 

Rate, review and subscribe wherever you like to listen. Find us on Facebook, Instagram and TikTok @mycrazyfriendpodcast. Email us at mycrazyfriendpodcast@gmail.com

Transcript

00:03
Welcome to another episode of My Crazy Friend. I'm Cori. And I'm Laura. And this is the show where we talk about crazy shit. Crazy shit.

00:13
In this episode we're going to talk about crazy gifts. It's the holiday season, so what better time? What better place? I guess we're going to talk about gifts we give, gifts we receive, and I've got some fun gift stories. I've got some crazy stories. Well, not so much stories, but gifts that maybe I would not like to receive that other people have received. Yeah, I have one of those.

00:43
Today I got my gift from Mother Nature. Oh. You know, red badge of courage. Visit from Aunt Flo, Shark Week, Crimson Tide, what else, the Red Baron, Riding the Cotton Pony, Bloody Mary, and finally, you know, checking into the Red Roof Inn. So what you're telling me is you're ragging it right now. Got my period.

01:08
And I've got so many cramps, so I'm gonna try to be very positive. But oh my god, it's kicking the my dolls ass right now. You know it's funny you say that because I had to go to bed early last night with cramps in the front and back and like indigestion and I don't get that. So I blame you now that I know. I didn't make any sense of it before but it's all coming from my head. So it's a sympathetic pain for me? Yeah. Or you sent it to me in advance knowing that I was gonna see you today. I don't know. I was just sharing it with you because it's been like this for two days.

01:38
Yeah, it's your fault. I don't know how your crazy body works, but I know it's somehow impacting. But yeah, that's the gift that keeps giving. Yeah, that's cool. That's not one of them that's on my list. All right, well, cool, cool, cool. But you know what? Why don't you, you have a story? Well, not so much a story as a list I put together myself. Wow. I know. I have a list today too. Oh, wow. So is this the list episode? What last year, last week was the animal episode? Well, I thought we were gonna do the gift episode, but it might turn into the list episode. I don't know, we'll have to see. The gift, the lift, we'll figure it out.

02:08
Gift list episode there you go. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Give me your list Okay So I was looking at stories of like weird ass gifts that people have either given or received trying to like no, right? We might have the same with oh shit Well, then feel free to chime in. Okay, cool. Okay might well I made my own though from other I did too. I combined like three Wow shit. All right. Well if you have one of these on your list just chime in and go hey You have it and we'll play like okay. Okay. Well, yeah, let's see

02:38
It might be different completely. Okay, cool. Well, let's see. So, this is a list of items that through people who post it on either Reddit or have been consolidated in other articles or some of them are celebrity gifts that they've received from crazy fans. So, it's a combination of all of those. So, mine is just celebrity gifts from fans. Oh, I only have like two of those. So, we'll only have a little bit of an overlap maybe. Yeah, yeah, probably. Perfect. I just hope yours is not my grand finale.

03:07
I hope not too. That'll be a bummer. You know maybe we should discuss this beforehand. I know. All right I won't tell the people though because I just have the thing so if it's one of yours just give me a little wink and a nudge and I'll breeze on through. Cool beans. All right so my first thing is eyebrow razors.

03:28
I know, I can tell from the look on your face that you don't know why I'm saying that. Because people posted they had gotten eyebrow razors. Oh, as a gift. As a gift. I think that's rude. Did they have bushy- That's what they were saying. Right, that just saying, hey, you got bushy eyebrows. Right, they were saying like, that's the same as saying, when are you due? Or, wow, you've gained a lot of weight, here's a scale, which was another bad gift idea. Or when people look at like your significant other and they're like, wow.

03:55
Wow, I can't believe he's with you. That's like you're ugly. Yeah. It's almost the same as giving somebody eyebrow razors. Anyway. Next on the list. I was watching, I follow this girl who's married to this really, really hot guy. And she's like average, you know what I mean? Like she's bigger and she's like overweight and she's got glasses and dark hair. And everyone's like, you know, how do you have such a husband? So it was just in my brain. Oh. They're like, how do you have such a good looking husband? And she's like, it's really offensive. I mean.

04:25
You know, what do you mean? Like, so I, clearly it's because they think that she's not good looking enough for him. Well, so maybe the next one on my list would be a good gift for her then. Okay, what's that? It's a personalized branding iron. Ooh. Yeah? So she could brand him. Yeah. Exactly. Wow. That's shocking. That's a crazy gift. Like, isn't that something like a puppy where you have to like ask someone ahead of time before you buy it? You would think. I don't know, I guess you don't have to use it.

04:55
What's the harm? It's probably not meant to be used on people, I would assume, maybe for like, burning into wood or food that you're cooking. I was thinking animals and I think that's mean. I mean, I suppose you could, but I'm assuming that I didn't read a lot about it. I just saw it's something I've gotten at. All right, that helps me because all I kept on thinking is, wow, these people are really into each other. They're branding each other. Okay, sorry. It seems like you wouldn't probably need a whole iron for that though. Like it's probably a once and done thing for branding each other, right? You just make, I don't know. Do you have to get a whole iron?

05:25
if you're only branding one thing, can't you just like sear it into somebody? I don't know, I'm asking for a friend. I was gonna say, I've never branded, so. Yeah, I don't know. I know like scarification, I don't know about branding. If you need a specific iron or not, I would think it's just heat. You know what, I don't even know. Doesn't matter. Personalized branding iron, number two on my list. Okay, cool, cool beans. How many things are on your list? I don't know, I didn't count. I didn't actually number them, they're bullets. Okay. If that one's a two, I might have a C later on. Who knows? We'll see where the world takes us.

05:54
Oh my god, you're insane. All right, let me, give me something else. All right, an ashtray in the shape of a lung. Oh, that's almost like the gift you guys gave me. I know. Well, it wasn't for...

06:12
Smoking cigarettes, but the ashtray said was it Jesus hates people that smoke. It says it's a picture of Jesus Yes, Jesus hates when you smoke. Oh, right when you're not people Specifically you yeah, so I have that ashtray. Yeah, you do. It's so funny That's what reminds me of and you use it every time you know speaking of yeah That is a gift that I got from you that it was pretty crazy. I've received a lot of those Yeah, you have I like to think I'm an excellent gift giver. I think you win for craziest gifts best gifts I brought a few along today

06:42
So after your list, we should pull some items out of this little bag, my little hat. Oh gosh. And I'm scared. And you can tell me about why you gave it to me. Okay. Ha ha ha.

06:55
I'm very excited. Isn't that fun? It is fun. Sorry, I digress like I normally do. Please give me something else off your list. Okay. Um, a cremation earn for your ashes after you die. I think that is fucking, that's practical. Especially if they know you're going to be cremated. I would appreciate that. I think it's wonderful. Like if someone was, if I'm going to be buried, I don't want to spend money on a plot. I don't want to spend that money. If someone gifts that to me, that's a good friend. All right. I agree. It's a little weird. Okay.

07:25
I'm just saying maybe it's not for everybody. Sure, sure, I think you should, you know, know, but you know, maybe they knew that person and would appreciate it. Yeah. I'd appreciate it. Yeah. Don't buy me an urn. I'd like to pick it out though, because I'm super picky. No, you don't get to pick out your own urn, it's a gift. I think that I should be able to pick it out. Not if it's a gift. I'm gonna register for the one that I want. I'm not gonna buy it for you then. You're such a bitch.

07:46
It's fine, I'll get someone else to buy it. That's why there's registries. Meh, I'm not gonna go off the registry. I like to go whatever. I know you do. Yeah. I like to think that I know you well enough to go completely off the list. Oh, I don't even tell you what I buy you anymore. No, I know it's great. Anyway, you ready for my next one before I digress too much? Yes. Okay. Jesus hates when you smoke. I heard ya. Okay, so I don't know if you know, I have a weird fascination with cookie cutters. I don't buy them.

08:16
look at them and all the shapes and shit that people like make cookie cutters. Well you do have cookie cutter ornaments for Christmas. I do. Yeah. And I've bought a penis one and a cat butt one. Yeah, but it's not like a main collection. Right. I don't go, oh my god, a new cookie cutter, I have to have it. Just a handful of weird ones. But this one, fetus cookie cutter. Huh. I assume it's for like pregnancy, but all I can think of is aborted fetuses when I see a fetus cookie cutter. And I...

08:46
I just thought what a weird fucking gift. Yeah, I don't think that I'd want to eat baby cookies. I don't know. I don't know. You know what though? Like I've eaten a penis cookie. So I mean. Yeah, but eating penis, well, weird and gross. It's not unheard of. Right. Eating a penis is kind of cannibalistic. A little bit. Just a little bit. Yeah, no, I agree with you. I think it depends on how realistic it was. Yeah. Like if it was just like a baby head cookie. Sure, I could eat a baby head cookie. I don't know.

09:16
I don't know! I'm trying to think. I've been to so many baby showers. Like that'd be the only appropriate place. And I can't remember anybody. I've had baby bottles, you know, binky, binky, no fetus cookies. No? No, maybe this is just out of the market. They did freeze fetuses in ice and we had to melt the ice cubes to get the babies out and that was a game. So I mean that's a little dark. You know? So I don't know. Sounds fun. I don't know. Give me another one. Did they make the ice cubes red?

09:46
It would have been fun, but I think it was like breaking the water. Oh, never mind. That's exciting. Anyway! Ahem!

09:53
Sorry. I'm gonna skip this one, because I'm gonna bet this is on your list, because it's pretty out there. It's a celebrity one. Give me the person. I don't know the person, I just wrote the item. So I'm gonna skip it, because it's weird. If it's not on your list, we'll come back to it. I'll remember. Just say it. You sure? Yeah, who cares? Don't let the people wait. Oh, okay, we don't wanna have any suspense in our show. What, I don't, I'm reading it upside down, and I don't think that. Okay, are you ready? But I might be reading the wrong line.

10:23
Listen, it's a severed human ear. Okay, it is on my list. Yeah, I figured it would. We'll just come back to it. Okay. Okay, we'll breeze by that. Just know that that's coming back. Maybe we'll edit out. Maybe we won't. It's actually my number two of my top nine. Oh, okay, cool. So you can give us a history behind it. I just saw it and thought that was fucking weird. Who has a severed, who sent? It was a fan gave a severed human ear. Yeah. Yeah, weird. Okay.

10:46
A book bound in human skin. Wow. And I'm gonna tell you. I'm sure there's many of those though. I'm sure, but this particular one I thought was fricking bizarro worlds. So I'm gonna tell you the story behind it if you don't mind. Do you have a minute? Do you have a minute for a story? I'm going nowhere. Oh, I hope that's not true. Shut up. Just tell your fucking story. Okay, so James Allen, a 19th century highwayman, robber and murderer.

11:16
wrote a book about himself before being executed for his crimes. Allen requested the book be made after his execution, bound in his skin, and given to John Fenno Jr., the man who was accusing him of attempted murder. Wow.

11:33
Now that is just vengeful. That's big fuck you. That's badass. Right, if he wasn't such a fucking asshole. That's badass. So was there only one book made, I guess? Apparently, I don't know how much human skin it takes to make a book. Is that how it goes? You can make a final request and they have to grant it? I know they have to give you your last meal as best they can. I guess if that's his final request. I mean, I don't think it's a law, but that was his final request. It's gotta happen. I guess. Is the book still in existence? I didn't do any extra research.

12:03
I would appreciate it. This is fascinating to me. Maybe I'll do a whole episode on just the book. That'll be one of the crazy stories I tell you. We'll see. I'm not committing to it because I don't know if it's that interesting or not. Maybe I told you the whole story already. We'll see. If it comes back again, we know it's more. Okay, you ready for my final, like, this one is the one that I'm just like, what in the actual fuck? Okay, and this one I think I might have to do a little research on if there is more. Okay, it's a lampshade made from human skin.

12:31
I know right that sounds like like I don't know so Nazi Germany stuff

12:37
Right? Like that's awful. That's crazy. So this guy, collector, it just says collector Skip Henderson. So he was at a New Orleans store. Okay. And I don't know, I would assume it would be like a thrift store, an assignment store. If it's in New Orleans, it could be like some voodoo shit. Oh, it could be. I don't know. So I'm gonna look into this and if there's any more on this, you'll hear about it. Thank you. Because yeah, and if there's not, if I can't find any then. You know what, people listening can Google us and tell us. You know what, that would be even easier for me if they did that.

13:07
It would. Just, you know, something to tell us. Alright. So anyway, so he didn't know what it was. He bought it and I just thought it was weird. Cool. And then his leather looks like, I'm sure it looks like human skin. I'm sure you really can't tell until you know. I mean, I'm not going to say one way or the other. I don't know because I've never seen human skin in anything. And I'm not Googling it because I'm not going to end up on some list. Yeah. I'm just going to breeze past that. So appreciate that. Sounds good.

13:37
investigation and he realized it was human skin I'm not sure how he figured out if he took it somewhere or whatever. I don't need to know. So point is after he figured it out he gave it to his friend. What a dick.

13:48
You would do that to me. That's why I was like, I love this guy so much. Yeah, you would totally do that to me. He's like, this is really cool. I gotta find out what this is. Holy fuck, that's gross. I'm not keeping it here, best friend. Guess what you get. Wow. Yeah, and then you gotta keep it because it's a gift from your bestie and it's one of a kind. What kind of asshole gets rid of that? Well, I mean. Would you be that person? No, no, I have so many things from you that I would normally have gotten rid of by now, but I have to keep them because from your stupid face. I love my stupid face. All right, so that's my list.

14:18
Perfect. Okay, before I start on my list. Yeah Actually, I did want to ask you something. I forgot. Okay last week we had said that lips and buttholes Were the same type of skin. Yeah, and we were you were so grossed out by that Yeah, and put off by that so you decided to share that with your family I would like you to tell everyone what your 15 year old son said to you Well, he goes, uh Yeah, I know

14:48
Did you know that the inside of the human cheek is made out of the same material as a vagina? Yep, not something you want to hear from your 15 year old son.

15:01
But it makes sense, I just never. It sure does, it sure does. We're just gonna pretend like he just knows interesting facts and that he's not 15 and that just disturbs the shit out of me because. Yeah, we're just not gonna even think about that part. Because I don't want my 15 year old son to talk about vaginas. Oh, well, he's gonna. Yeah. You're just gonna. Not to me though, not to me. I'm gonna start talking about having sex with his dad and then it's gonna be, you know. Yeah, that's weak. So yeah, awesome. That was a fact I didn't know.

15:31
So I learned something from your kid. Yeah, you know what they say, you learn something every single day. Every day. Every single day. And we like to educate. Once we've been educated, we like to continue to educate. So sharing it with our friends. All right. So, okay, I guess the question is, do you want my list or do you wanna play a game? You know what, do your list because, well, shit. Cause I wanna talk about one of the gifts that we've given each other, but I don't know if it's in your bag of goodies. It is not.

16:00
Oh, it's not. No. Well, do your list, then we can do games. We can get our little gift exchange of gifts we've already received. Okay. All right. Let's do it. Okay. Tell me about your celebrity gifts, because you're already... All right. So I have nine of the weirdest celebrity gifts. Oh. And we can fly through them pretty... They're pretty crazy. We'll fly through it pretty fast. Okay. All right. I mean, no need. It's our podcast. It's our time. I know, but... Plus, we know how to cut, but I'd really like to not spend a lot of time editing, so let's edit on the fly. We do know how to cut for those listening.

16:30
We have done a few podcasts, so. For fun. Believe it or not, this is not our first, even though it seems like we've never done it. Oh yeah, maybe we should admit to that. Don't admit to that. We don't actually try to be professional. We just, you know. We can always cut it later. Yep, that's our go-to. That's why we're so good at cutting. Right. And there's probably a lot we should have cut that we don't. But you know what, it would be cool if you could try to cut in your brain before it comes out of your mouth, and I'll do the same. And then it'll save us time in the editing room later. You know that's never gonna happen.

17:00
It'd be great. Alright, shut up. Go. I'm going. Edit your list. In my, what? You said you're, I'm gonna speak my list. Right, right, right, right. Okay, are you ready? I'm so ready. I've never been more ready. Holy shit. Okay. These are the 10 craziest gifts, in my opinion, that I know of. You said nine. Oh, it's 10. Oh, okay. No, it's nine. It's nine.

17:25
I was like, it's only nine. I'm not editing this down. Everybody can hear you. Your brain. Go. I know. You know what?

17:33
You're welcome. Go. I don't really care. Okay, number nine. Number nine. Avra Lavigne. Oh yeah. Not a big fan, but that's fine. Avra, she received a dead rabbit from a local fan. That's creepy. Yeah, but apparently in some parts of the world, that rabbits can be a form of good luck. I think she was in Asia somewhere, but she just thought it was super creepy. The whole thing, not just the foot. Like I've heard of people giving feet. The whole rabbit. That's, all right, maybe it's more luck that way. It's four feet and a head.

18:03
That's more luck. I had four times at least. Yeah, four rabbit's feet. That's gotta be like, look, hey, this is disgusting. Okay, ready? I don't know. Number eight, Zac Efron. Okay. One fan. He's a hottie pants. He is pretty hot. Can't help it. He just can't help it. He has a hottie pants. One fan took it to the extreme and sent him a piece of their skin. Why? Yeah, he was very unsettled by it. What is with people and their skin? I don't know, I guess it like it's, he touched me. But not really, like you know. Not really. You know, like when you're like, oh.

18:33
You know, you threw something at him. So I'm never gonna wash my face again, or you shook my hand, I'm never gonna wash my face again. Yeah. You know, then you're like, oh, he's touched a piece of my skin, or my DNA. I don't know, dude. But that skin has not touched you then. No, and it's dead, and it's gross, and I don't understand. And I doubt that he actually touched it. Yeah. He probably opened it like, fuck no. Oh, his people probably opened it. I thought you said his penis. Yeah, his penis. That's how Zac Efron opens letters. With his penis. He doesn't need a letter opener. Allegedly.

19:03
You get some paper cuts that I would not admire.

19:10
All I can think about is who is Zac Efron naked opening letters at this speed. Oh my god.

19:20
It's actually pretty good. I mean, that one movie, that one movie, he had like a bee on his crotch. Okay. Because he was naked, because he did like, you know what I'm talking about? I think his bad grandpa or, no. Oh, I forget what it was. I don't remember, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. But yeah, there was one movie where he had a bee on his penis, and it's, you know, just replaced that with some letters. I got the visual. Like, I don't even have to make it up. All right, nevermind. Yeah, okay. So, Hang on. Um,

19:50
Sorry. Number seven, Norman Reedus. And I didn't know who Norman Reedus is. I'm glad, because I didn't either. Well, apparently, according to my husband, Walking Dead. Oh, that's why. Yeah, I don't watch it, but he does. He's a super fan. So anyway, he received a two-headed squirrel. Someone turned and taxidermed, is that the right word? Taxidermed. True. A squirrel and added a head of a second squirrel and taxidermed the whole thing and sent him a two-headed squirrel in the mail. Wow.

20:20
So if that doesn't belong on the list of craziest shit. No it does. I don't know if it does. It does. Alright, number six. Okay. This went to the Jonas Brothers. Aww. The Jonas Brothers. The Jonas Brothers. The Jonas Brothers. Can't talk. They received a baby shark.

20:39
Baby shark then then and then like that yes, but no but now um it was preserved in tube I don't know they apparently the brothers were very baffled Um, who wouldn't they never figured out why they got it?

20:52
But sure, a baby shark. Like it used to be live, now dead, baby shark. Baby shark in a preserved bottle. Alrighty. Alright, number five, Daniel Radcliffe. Ooh, Harry Potter. Yeah, I love Harry Potter. I love the whole thing. Not happy about the author, but regardless, completely was into, I wanted to be a witch. When I was a kid, I wanted to be magic, be a witch. It's shocking to me. I watched all those, there was all those 80 movies.

21:22
80s movies. Yeah, I could tell you all of them, but that's fine. We don't need to talk about that. No, I'm sure we will though. So he received a milk bottle, a picture of a milk bottle in front of a front door. And you say, well, that doesn't seem that weird. Yeah. It was his door.

21:39
Someone was at his house Creepy you do do yeah, that would freak me out. That would freak me out. Yeah, so anyway, all right number four, okay? One-direction yeah someone mailed a tampon to Niall Horan's home address and I don't know if it was used or not the article specifically doesn't say it doesn't know but I don't think I want to know I'm gonna say it was used. I'm gonna sense a non used one. Yeah, there was some other there was some other person I just it's not a celebrity that I know

22:09
but I think it's international celebrity and someone wrote in blood a letter to that celebrity But it wasn't like bleeding blood. It was like period blood. Oh fun gross, right? Oh, yeah. All right Not that that's not that bleeding is gross writing in it is gross writing it is gross writing it any blood is gross Yeah, I agree. So that's all all right number three Miss Dolly Parton who I love mm-hmm and adore

22:34
She's gorgeous. She received a baby on her doorstep named Jolene. A real baby. What? Yeah. Eventually, I guess she found a good home for the baby, and they have no idea still where it came from. But yeah, a baby named Jolene on her front door. Because her song Jolene, I guess. Isn't that crazy? So how did she know the baby was named? They didn't have a name tag on, I guess. They had a birth certificate, but no mom listed or something. I don't know. I'm making that up. I don't know how she knew, but the baby's name was Jolene. All right. Yeah, a name tag, possibly.

23:04
I'd have to research that but you know I don't want to lie to people. That doesn't matter. But crazy right? Right. Alright number two. Alright. This goes in with you. Okay. Was yours Jared Leto? Yes. Yeah so Jared Leto received an ear from a fan. That's just creepy to me. Yes and people didn't believe him. He made it into a necklace and he actually there's pictures out there that he posted of the ear with the string through it. Oh I did read that. Yes. Yep I did read that and that was too much for me so I'm like I'm just gonna stop.

23:34
with the ear as a crazy gift. Him being a nutso with it is too, just an added level of... Yeah, it's like double crazy. He's still cute, but yeah. Yeah, he's adorable. But yeah, a little nutty. Apparently so. Yeah, cool. Cool. Alright, and my number one, Ed Sheeran. Alright. He received a cake. He loves cake. You think, oh, no big deal. So he's so excited about the cake. You've been into the cake. It was made of human hair. Ah!

24:00
The woman's hair. Ah! Let's tell him. Ah! Ah! Ah! Weird as fucking hell. Ah! I would never eat anything that I received in the mail that wasn't something that I ordered from a reputable place. Right? If you don't get it in a public restroom, it's just not worth eating. If you don't know who that person is. All right, okay. I mean, am I right or am I right? You are so not right. I'm right. Okay.

24:25
We went to the Bahamas. Yeah, we did. And everything shuts down there early. I'll give you that. And Laura was starving. Starving.

24:35
and we went to a bunch of places. Everything was closed or closing. The restaurant was closing, so she was starving, so we weren't sure what we were gonna do. It was like two in the morning. Yeah, it was like two in the morning. And everything had been closed since like six p.m. I wouldn't say that long because you did find someone with leftovers. Oh, one of the expensive places that we couldn't afford to eat at was still open. Or I think it was closing. Because I think we got to the point where we didn't care how much it was gonna cost. Yeah. We were gonna go anywhere. I think you might be right. At two o'clock in the morning, they must have just been hanging out awhile.

25:05
It doesn't fucking matter. What matters is we went- We were starving. Laura and I went to the bathroom and we all were starving. And a woman in there had her leftovers in the bathroom, the public restroom, off the casino. And Laura said, oh, that looks delicious. And the woman said, do you want them? And Laura said, yes. Yes, I did. So she took some woman, she met in a bathroom's leftovers. Best food I ever had. And she ate. No, we did not share with her. And then it even had like a dipper in it. You didn't share with me or I didn't share with you.

25:35
I wasn't willing to touch it. I wasn't willing to give it to you. No, there was no willingness on my part. So it was in a metal container. They even stole the metal like dipper container that you're supposed to give back. So they stole the container, which she still, Laura still has to this day as a souvenir because you know, she's not the one that sold it. It was given to her. It was. It was a gift. It was a gift. The kind stranger in the bathroom. Yes, it was a gift. And so my point is, she ate that whole thing. That woman could have like spit on it. That woman could have double dipped in the dip.

26:05
bit it, put it back, whatever, I don't know. And she said it was the best food she ever. So when she talks about that kind of stuff, you have to question, you know, her... Standards? Yeah, well, yeah. When it comes to food? Or choices, sure, sure, sure. We could talk about that, and we could talk about how you eat food right out of the trash for talking along those lines. Three times you've done this. Three. Not once, not three on the same day. Okay, can we just say first of all, three different things? First of all, sure. It was my garbage. It doesn't matter.

26:33
And it's a clean bag. Okay. So if I throw something in there and it's in a clean, it's in a bag, and then I accidentally threw it in and it's in a clean bag. Right. Whatever. No, I'm with you. Yeah. I'm agreeing with you that that's fine. I'm just also saying that it was in a clean carry out container that was closed, just happened to be see-through. It was still steamy, so it was totally safe. And knowing that she took... I think it was Styrofoam. No, it was, no, I knew what it was. I could see through it. Oh.

27:00
was that why because you were like that looks so good that's chicken fingers with chicken fingers honey mustard dipping sauce and ranch and fries oh my god I can remember it like it was yesterday I don't remember anything I think it was years ago so fucking good we are really earning our explicit rating today by the way with our f-bombs okay well I'll cut back yeah if you could that'd be great you're just dropping them left and right stop you're rude! that's been saying it don't you're looking at me like you think I'm serious

27:30
Sorry, you couldn't see my face with a smile on it even though I'm sitting across from you. No, that's understandable But anyway, that was your list Yeah, that was my that was my list. That was totally my list That's crazy. So he ate a hair. Yeah hair cake. That's number one. All right. Yeah, so Should we play a game? Let's play a game. All right. Do you want to play a game? I do I do. Okay ready I'm ready so

28:00
bag of gifts you've given me. I'd like you to put your hand in and pull one out and tell us about it. I feel like I should have put a bag together of gifts you've given me because you've given me some really interesting things as well. Okay cool.

28:14
No, I lost it for a while, but I finally found it well well I witnessed you using this thing okay, so this is a go-girl And for those of you who may not know what a go-girl is it is a What's the word Silicone yeah sure funnel yeah that you The women use and it can't you put it up here pee like a man right you like put it up against your vagina

28:44
Vagina funnel. It is, and it is long. Yep. And you hold it up and then it's got a spell on it. And it's like you have a penis. Yeah, and so you can pee. Yeah. Outside. Yeah. And Laura used to use it cause she's a soccer mom. And she used to use it because she doesn't like porta potties. So, and then when we go on long drives during COVID and we couldn't stop in places, it came in handy too. Like Laura just could pee on the side of the road like a dude. Yeah, it was fantastic. It was, it was. I remember cause I have a picture of you

29:14
this girl sticking out of your jeans and you're like don't take my picture but i have it but you did yeah i know i have you like just pissing in the woods from behind it's such a cool shot anyway the thing came in handy so yeah yeah and you know what i've used this many i don't see many times a handful of times and uh we went to see pearl jam the other week um

29:39
and it was a drive and we got stuck in Philly traffic on the schoolkill. And I don't know if you've witnessed this or not, but it's a, I used to live there. So I was on the school school all the time. Yeah, yeah, I know. It was kind of a bummer. And I had to pee like you would not believe. And so Sean was like, well, do you want me to pull over? I'm like, yeah, but we couldn't. So he was like, we'll just go in this bottle. And he's like, you can do that, right? Yeah. I was like, that's not how girls work. And he's like, you can do it. I'm like, all right, well,

30:09
I can't. I can't. You're in the traffic in the Scoogle and you're dropping your drawers? Yeah. But I got in the back seat. I don't care. Yeah. Well, you do have tinted windows. Thank God. Okay. So I took my pants off because I'm not about to piss on them. I got a concert to go to. Was it just you and Shawn? Yeah. Okay, good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was going to say that might be too much for, you know, anybody joining you on the ride. I don't know. Okay, cool. You got to do what you got to do, right? Hey, if it's your husband who cares, pee in a bottle. Not me. Okay.

30:39
I squat it and got the bottle up, but it's really hard to aim. Yeah. I tried. Did you make a mess in the car? Dude, I got more on the floor mats than I got in the bottle. Oh my god. So I had to stop. Oh my god. Oh my god. Are you freaking serious right now? Yeah, I'm so serious. Sorry, I don't mean to snort.

31:05
How do I own this? Ethan understands, he's like, don't you just have the one home, Kate? You lined it up, but I don't know how to explain to him. Was this Shawn's car? Yeah. You were gonna be dead. Okay, her husband is such a car guy. Like, she's not allowed to drink certain things. Okay, so let me back it up, back it up, back it up. My friend Laura is a mess. Like, when I say a mess, I mean like, everywhere she goes.

31:35
She makes a mess. You're not a mess as a human. You're a beautiful human. However, as far as like going places or just sitting still, she makes a mess. I don't have time for those stories. I don't, yeah. Well, I'm sure we'll have plenty to tell. I will say this though. Like, I don't think that you own many articles of clothing that don't have some leftover of mess that you've made. And, you know, your husband does the laundry and he does a pretty good job, but there's just some things like, you know,

32:05
markers or wax or who knows what's like you know mustard is a good one. Sometimes you don't know. Mustard is one of your very favorites to get on yourself. But yeah she always makes a mess. I have pollen from flowers that are on my jeans. I can't get out years later. I don't know. Messes are attractive to me. It's not my fault but anyway. Yeah so anyway her husband like has a bunch of stuff that he would prefer she don't like you know she loves Starbucks maybe don't drink Starbucks in his car. It spills he drives like a maniac.

32:35
let you pee in his car and thought that was a good idea. You know, shame on him. That's what I say. We talk about this all the time. Shame on him indeed. We know you. Shame on him. So he says I need one of these to keep in the car. Oh you do. So if you're not gonna use it I'm gonna keep it but go ahead. I love this. I just haven't had a reason to use it yet. Lucky.

32:52
So anyway, so that was that one. All right, you ready? Yeah, go ahead, pull another. All right, I'm nervous now, that was a good one. What is this? Hundreds of uses, a back says, what's the front? Pander pants! Pander pants! So these are underpants for your hands. Yes, and they're amazing, they're my driving gloves. Sure, so they look like men's briefs. Yes, regular whitey tighties, tidy whiteys. Yep, and they have the fingers cut out. Yep, and they're gloves. They are.

33:22
they just look like you. I saw them like this. I think you're so rude for saying that, but I do love them so much and I wear them to drive. The one's got like some of your little coffee stain on them. It looks like my right hand's pissed itself. Your hand has a stain on the crotchal area. I mean they're not, you know, they're not men's underwear without a stain, right? We'll have to post these as soon as we get our pages up and running. We'll post these.

33:52
You put them on backwards, one's inside out I think. They're the same. You see what I mean? Yeah, they're gonna be like that. Oh really? Doesn't matter. Aw, they're adorable though. You really pull those off and they look like you. Okay, that's great. They're not for everybody. Pick something else. Okay, you're welcome. Okay, what's this one?

34:11
Oh, five fake tampon flasks. Yes. Apparently this was a menstruating episode. We didn't even mean for it to be. No, we really didn't. But yeah, so those are tampons, but you put booze in them. Yeah, it says, smoke all your booze in plain sight. But I'm thinking it's not just, obviously, it's anything you want to hide. Yeah, you could put whatever you want. You want one? Do you need one? I mean... Because I just need one. You just need one? So if you can, I'll just give you, that's a regift if I've ever seen it. You gave it to me. I'm gonna just check it out. And now I'm regifting one to you.

34:41
So it's a tampon wrapper. Yeah. But inside is a plastic like shot tube, booze tube. Yeah, booze tube. So all it is is the wrapper and this thing fits in it. Perfect, right? Yeah. No one's gonna look at that. That's gonna save you in so many concerts. Oh my god. You're welcome. You're so smart. Anyway, I love you right now. I know. That was so great. So anyway, but you're so great because you got it to me first. I love them. Yeah. They're really, they're really gonna save our asses,

35:11
There's only one more. Uh oh. So just give it to you. Okay. It's not in there. It's not in there because that would be disgusting. I gave you it because I've used it.

35:20
So you just get the box. I don't store it in the box. I saved the box for Dorian, cause no one knows, it's just a pretty box. Right. So yeah, now it's actually with my other toys. So everybody listening is like, I have no idea what you're talking about. Oh, I know, let's just keep going. So, the item that she gave me is with my feminine masturbation toys. Feminine masturbation. Feminine masturbation toys.

35:47
So this is a yoni egg. Yes. It's a love stone yoni egg. So it's a gemstone in the shape of a little egg that you stick up your badge. Yep. Or your hoo-ha or your cooter or whatever you like to call it when you're getting intimate with it and your love stone. Yep. And there's different things you can do with it. You can use it for like, you know, if you want to exercise those keel muscles and stuff like that. You know, you can get all nice and tight and awesomeness. You use it for that. Especially after having babies. We've had babies.

36:17
That helps with that. And still though, I mean, I appreciate it, but a weird gift to get from your best friend.

36:25
I think it's because you got two and you just gave me one. I don't think you actually thought, hmm, I want to buy this and give this to Corey. Yeah, you got to you paid for them. It's not like you know, I accidentally ordered it twice because I do. That's what she does. She does everything in excess. Oh, Karenathan. Yep. What you saying? I do everything to excess. You're still use. No, think about it. We were talking about last last episode. We were talking about your animals. You have eight animals because you buy a dog.

36:55
and you're like, we need a dog for the dog. And then we need a dog for the other human in the house. And then we need a dog for the other human in the house. You end up with four. Right. And then same thing with cats. You're like, oh, I want one of those. But oh, you want one of those. And oh, they have an extra one of those. And you know. Three for the price of one. Yep. So now you have four cats and four dogs. Yeah. And I like to think of it as a small commune. Yeah, let's talk about, let's talk about like hobbies. Like anytime you start a hobby, you go all in. I do. You do. That's what you say. Yeah.

37:24
now you have a candle business and it's right before the holidays and you literally are making hundreds of candles. Your house looks like a candle factory. Thank you. Yeah I mean you're good at it. I'm glad you're having fun but um I'm taking that as a compliment even though I felt like it wasn't necessarily. But that brings us are you done with those gifts? I am done. That was I just it was just three quick gifts I wanted to. Because that was actually a perfect segue into four quick gifts. Into my gift. Oh okay. About you know you're

37:54
and doing things to excess. Yes. So the gift I was going to talk about Yeah. was our gift. We kind of did it for each other. Tambourines. Oh yeah. Well, I mean, I don't know if anybody's noticed but we actually play the tambourine in the beginning of every episode and that is because we are tambristas. Yes, we are.

38:15
And speaking of excess, so, um... We decided... What, over the beginning of the summer maybe? No, it was in the winter, last winter. We decided we like to learn new things and do new things. And I guess we've just reached, we've done so many new things, we thought, why not learn an instrument? Well, we like to put music on and have dance parties. We... Yeah.

38:38
I was trying to make it sound a little bit cooler. What's wrong with dance parties? Nothing. Anyway, so... I like...

38:46
dancing. I do too but anyway so we thought we talked about how it would be fun if we had tambourines when we're doing this shit. Yeah. You know so then for Cori's birthday I thought well wouldn't it be fun if we had tambourines when we're doing this shit. Oh it was the best gift. So I got her a tambourine but I can't just get her a tambourine I gotta get one too. Yeah. So I bought two tambourines. Sure did. And they came in two separate packages to my house. They sure did. And each time one came it rattled and so the first time one got delivered

39:16
And I said, oh, it's a tambourine. Don't worry about it. He's like, okay, why? And I'm like, don't even worry about it. And then he's like, okay. And I said, it's a gift for Cori, don't worry about it. Okay. And then- It was my birthday, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was birthday gift. And then the second one came and he goes, why is there another tambourine here? Did you order two accidentally? Cause you know, I'm known to do that. Sure, sure, sure. And I was like, no, no, this one's on purpose. This one's for me. He's like, no, it's fucking not. Like, oh, it absolutely is for me.

39:46
out of the box, he hated this thing. Oh my gosh. And yeah, so that's when it all started, because our husbands hate them so much. So much. But, you know, you'd think, you know, we would take that, because it's one of those things where, you know, they shouldn't have let us know they hated them. Not only did we practice and play the tambourine around them, we thought, mm, let's take this one step, I'm sorry, you thought, mm, let's take this one step further. One step further, indeed. So yeah, we for sure practiced and let them know we were practicing, but every time they heard it,

40:16
or left the house. They threatened divorce. Which is amazing because if we were sick of being around our husbands, we knew exactly what we could do to get rid of them. All we had to do was pull out the tambourines and they're like, oh, we're getting a drink. It's perfect. All we had to do was just pick it up. We didn't have to plan the play. Just pick it up and they were out the door. It was fantastic. We're heading to go watch the game. See ya. So a little hint for anybody. But anyway, so side bonus.

40:46
We got all of this. No support. No support for our tambourine. My mom came over and she's like, why do you have a tambourine? Did you get this for free? Like this is the reaction that everybody that came into my house kept on. Everyone made fun of us. Why do you have it? What are you going to do with that? You have no rhythm. You can't play tambourine. You have to have some rhythm if you're going to play a percussion instrument. Blah, blah, blah, blah. Right. Screw you guys. So we thought. Right? Chokes on them. Apparently we have to be able to like dance. We can't.

41:16
A beat? Whatever. Whatever, I don't think any of that's necessary. It's totally not. So, we practiced. Yep. And we decided, you know what? So we have this party at our house every year. Yes. And we have. Laura has a party and she actually invites famous, some local, some not local. She always has a really cool band here every year. And some, you know, it switches up, you have some regulars. But yeah, we have like, it's like a music festival in her backyard. It's so much fun. It's fantastic. Yeah.

41:46
Nathan Grey and the Iron Roses. Now they're just the Iron Roses, no Nathan Grey. Anyway, he's still in it. Not the point of the story. So he was in case you want to check them out. They're awesome. Yeah they are. So he was a singer of Boy Sets Fire back in the day and he did a couple of those songs. But anyway, so when he came, part of the like, I talked to him a little bit ahead of time, was like, hey can my bestie and I play tambourines on rebel songs? Which is one of his songs. Yeah, and I'm pretty sure you did that without my permission. Oh yeah, yeah.

42:16
like full blown I was panicked. Yeah, you didn't want to do it. But it's okay, I asked him anyway. And he said, sure. And I said, just don't tell Sean it's gonna be a surprise. And then the day before the party, I was moving my tambourine, he said, if you even bring that thing near the party tomorrow, I swear to God. I'm like, okay, whatever.

42:35
So then the first song of the party was Rebel songs. So we got up and we did our whole choreographed tambourine song and dance. We actually practiced to that song. It was amazing. It was so good. We even started off with like calling out our husbands. It was fantastic. And I was ready for that. Then we ended up doing it again and I wasn't ready for it. And then- Well, yeah, cause we ended up having two parties last year. And the second party, Jeff Caudill of Game Face came and Popeye from Far Side came.

43:05
pulled me up to a song that I'd never practiced and never even heard right even hear it before yeah I didn't even know that song so yeah yeah well I wasn't playing I do to be your friend and well I asked them ahead of time if they minded if we fucked up one of their songs and then they could play it again without us fucking it up they were so inclined yeah I don't think they felt like we fucked it up though well they didn't think like we did it in a favor said that we were pretty much on beat most of the time that's pretty good

43:35
Isn't that like the point? I think. Yeah, so again, our husband still hates us. Oh god, it was amazing. So we've added, we have shoe tambourines now, we have different shapes, we have star and moon tambourines. Yeah we do, different colors. Yep, excess. Black, blue, yellow, white. Yes, yes. Oh yeah, absolutely in excess. We've got it at the beginning of our podcast. We even added a cowbell. We don't like the way that sounds though. I think we're gonna get a different one. Yeah, we might have to, we'll find a way to weave the cowbell in once we perfect that as we've perfected the tambourines. Oh sure. I mean we played with three

44:05
professional artists. We're basically professional tamburistas. Basically. Tamburistas, I don't know what the word is. I don't know. Three times though. Yep, three times a pattern makes. I mean two times or three bands. So I'm gonna count it as three times. Three artists. Do you remember the three times pattern makes? Yeah, three times pattern makes. That's what you said about me eating it. I know. You said I've only done it three times. And I said, well, three times pattern makes, my friend. That sticks in my head all the time. It's so funny. So funny. Oh my goodness. All right, let me see if there's anything else

44:35
about I don't know I see you've got a little snack over there and I'm wondering you told me I wasn't allowed to ask you about it right I was gonna close out the show do you remember last episode we talked about cucumbers and how they taste like watermelon um yeah I remember you telling me that they taste like watermelon if you dip them in sugar if you put it sugar on so here you go there's a little plate for you okay so this was when we were talking about that's okay that's okay if that's loud we're gonna have to edit that out so anyway cause

45:05
You would. So we were saying that watermelon, when you put salt on it. Oh these were crazy facts I think. Oh yes, that was our random fact of the day. So this will be a fact. Yeah so we're gonna, if you dip a cucumber in sugar it's supposed to taste like watermelon. Okay and this is regular watermelon or watermelon after it's had salt on it? I think it's regular. I think the salt came because you like to eat salt with it. Oh okay I just added that. So if you want to put salt in your sugar maybe then it will taste like

45:35
Mmm, yeah. Well, what do you think? They're not wrong. Oh my god. It does. I even got a piece of the outside and it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. No, it still tastes like watermelon.

45:48
I don't hate it. I don't hate it either. This is kind of a fun snack. Did you wash the I should have asked. Did you wash the cucumber before I ate it? Yeah, my mom used these to make salad. She'd wash the whole thing. So yes, you're good. Well, you have to tell me about your mom's visit. Yeah. Not on, on, on, on. We'll figure it out. I'm looking at this trying to turn this off and finish a sentence at the same time. You're so weird. Not on. So yeah, that's it. That was our crazy, crazy gifts. That was our crazy gifts. That was a fun episode. Yeah, I appreciate you. I appreciate you. Thank you for all the gifts.

46:18
I thank you for all my gifts. Oh, you're welcome. I'm sure I use gifts That you've gotten me like all the time. They'll come up. Yeah, this was this was fun. This is really the key ones Well, then tell me you meet again. All right. Well, we got to do our our sign off, right? I don't even know what our sign off is. No, we'll add it then. Okay. Bye

46:39
Hey, before we go, wasn't there something you want to tell all the peoples? Pfft. Ha ha.

46:45
Yeah, don't forget to rate, review, and subscribe to our little podcast wherever you like to listen. We heard it's important. Super important. Yep, and where else can they find us, Laura? You know, I'm glad you asked. They can also find us on Facebook, TikTok, and Instagram at My Crazy Friend Podcast. And if you have anything you wanna tell us, just email us at mycrazyfriendpodcast.gmail.com. All that is accurate. So yeah, until next time. Later.

47:15
you